Body Image and Sex

Becoming a woman is a bit like becoming celebrity, only more traumatic. This is either a fairly agreeable, or vastly unpleasant experience depending on what you look like and how popular you are. You go from being an uninteresting skinny child, more or less left to your own devices, to suddenly being incredibly fascinating to everyone the moment your breasts and hips start to appear.


Three months ago you were just a kid, blissfully unaware of the storm awaiting you with the onset of puberty. Nobody cared if you had hairy legs or short fingernails, chubby ankles or even if you were a girl or not, but now all of a sudden everyone has an opinion on you. From your split ends to your unpainted toenails and everything in between, suddenly everyone you know (and plenty of people you don’t) wants to tell you exactly what’s wrong with you. Magazines are full of pictures and articles and adverts of how you should look, your mother is tutting at your stretch marks, your aunts tell you how easy it will be for you to give birth with those hips, boys at school shout obscenities about your vagina across the playground. It’s all very stressful.


Then there are the body changes. Boys – a bit of extra hair and a deeper voice do not a dramatic pubescent transformation make. Try growing a pair of boobs (it hurts) and going home from school one day to discover your pants are full of blood (yeah, that hurts too). I think it took me about ten years to get used to the shock of getting an unrecognisably new body in the space of about three months. Granted, the transformation isn’t as a dramatic or fast for many girls. I was envious of my peers’ girlish bodies with their tiny pert breasts and slender hips, but perhaps they were jealous of mine too. I couldn’t do the things I used to do, like climb trees and dance and run about, without my new body getting in the way. It was like it had betrayed me.


It is against a background of all this drama and bleeding and trauma and pressure and tits and image and advertising and probably some awkward lights-out fumbling teenage sex that we emerge into our twenties. It is unsurprising then, that girls carry some insecurity into our relationships, specifically surrounding our bodies and exposing them to the critical eyes of others. I’m certainly not saying that guys don’t have insecurities too, but there isn’t quite that same intense pressure that we are under, to be perfect. Once the clothes come off and presumably there’s been some snogging, so many of us have this nagging feeling that we aren’t up to scratch. That scar, that spot, that stretch mark, that bit that wobbles a bit too much, that bit that doesn’t wobble enough…it’s a minefield.


And it can stop us from actually enjoying the experience - inhibition about our bodies gets in the way of good sex. Don’t you wish you could just laugh about the whole thing, not care anymore? Not that it isn’t easier said than done, it took me years to get over feeling inhibited and self-conscious about some aspects of my body. I’m certainly not all there yet either. But I’ve learned a valuable lesson along the way too, in that how you feel about yourself is what others see. People pick up on our carefully hidden insecurities.


Once you get over worrying about your flaws, you’ll realise no-one else really cares about them either. I once asked a male friend about whether guys are actually bothered about a bit of extra wobble, prominent ribs or boobs that are slightly different sizes whilst in the throes of passion – he said this: Woman, we’re so stoked to be having sex with you at all, we couldn’t care less or even notice. All we’re thinking is – this girl wants to have sex with me, she has tits and a fanny – awesome.


Not delicately put, but you get the idea.


Alice.


Twitter: @lucyetlapin
URL:   http://aliceetlapin.blogspot.com

The only way is LYYB

For our April articles LYYB has decided to tackle some of your body quarrels, as ever our LYYB co-founders are game to try anything, talk about everything and experiment on your behalf. Our ladies and gents at LYYB are concerned by an ever growing epidemic of orange skin, false body parts and strange hair, this look combined as we understand it is something that originates from a TV mock drama called ‘The Only Way Is Essex’, if you are unfamiliar with this program it consists of some almost wealthy people from Essex telling each other to ‘shut up’ and fall out, then make-up and then probably fall out again.

LYYB wanted to investigate how programs such as TOWIE have affected people's body issues, when the people on these shows have all had plastic surgery, are all head to toe in fakery and seem more bothered about what they look like than what’s on the news.

Emma and Gemma are as per usual our Guinea-pigs in this experiment, we gave them a TOWIE make-over that neither will forget in a hurry, we’ve asked them to document; how much, how long and how they felt during the fake-over, we’ve supplied some wonderful photographic evidence and we want our readers to decide which is best... The Only Way Is Essex? Or The Only Way Is LYYB?

Has fakery taken over or can natural beauty still prevail...

Emma: Gemma and I spent a total of about £30 each on; tan, fake hair and fake lashes, now spending £30 on that doesn’t sound a lot and we by no means bought expensive, the scary part about the cost is that would be £30 for one night, you couldn’t reuse most of the products we purchased because they simply wouldn’t last, I don’t even want to think about the cost if you went to a salon and got all this fakery done professionally! In total the time it took me to get tanned up to my eyeballs, apply the buckets of make-up and slap those eyelashes on was 2 hours, I couldn’t spend every Saturday night getting ready for that long, the terrifying thing is that people wear this stuff everyday... how much time are they wasting on looking like an umpa lumpa. Now the truly horrendous part of the experience was how I felt all tantastic... I felt like I wouldn’t be able to behave like myself almost like i’d stepped into another person’s shoes, maybe it’s something you get used to, but I certainly couldn’t go out and have chats with people about what books i’m reading or the economic crisis, people would think i’d banged my head. Maybe that makes me a terribly shallow person that I see someone dressed like that and instantly think ‘well she hasn’t got much between the ears’, but surely there is an element of an intelligent human being thinking ‘I don’t want to spend this much money or this much time looking like this.’ I do like looking good, I am notoriously bad for spending all my money on clothes and shoes, however I am intelligent enough to say no to some simply ridiculous trends. I also can’t help but think what picture these people paint for the younger generation, that we should all be tanned, toned and spend time worrying over what we look like to enth degree? When the simple fact in my mind is that yes you should take care of yourself, you should take pride in your appearance whatever that means to the individual but I don’t think promoting this look that can only really be achieved successfully if you have buckets of spare time and cash is healthy.

Gemma: I was quite excited about this little challenge. Having a performing arts background I always jump at the chance to ‘dress up’. My initial thoughts were dressing up TOWIE was going to be easy... I was wrong. Not only did we spend the majority of saturday shopping for all our TOWIE supplies it took us god knows how many hours to prep and ‘apply’ until we had achieved the full look. I do take my hats off to the girls who have this crazy beauty regime, the amount of time and effort that goes into this ritual is epic!! I know as girls we should celebrate our natural beauty but while applying my fake tan I enjoyed the feeling of creating a persona. The fake tan acted like another layer of skin which made me feel a little less shy about my body. Maybe the girls who dress TOWIE do it to mask their inner body issues!? Maybe caking their bodies in fakeness allows them to create a persona that makes them feel confident?! hmmm. I did enjoy the ‘dress up’ but I am not sure it would make me feel ‘confident’ on a night out. Yes the fake tan made me feel a little less self conscious but combined with the mountains of make-up, fake hair and tight dresses it just made me feel a little bit silly. I would be too busy worrying if my hair piece/ eyelashes/ boobs have fallen out or if all my make-up is still on instead of just enjoying my night out.

So will Essex win your votes or will LYYB’s natural looking lovelies win in what can only be described as the ultimate face off... it’s up to you to decide...

To cast your vote simply comment below the post TOWIE or LYYB and we’ll collate the votes and share your views at the end of the month.

The Only Way Is LYYB x

An end to Facebook

LYYB loves Facebook as much as the next human but we’re concerned about a few woeful stories we’ve heard in regards to this social media phenomenon. Is it possible for Facebook to ruin relationships, cause arguments and perhaps even destroy everything an individual holds dear? 


Surely not? Social media is key in today’s society even LYYB wouldn’t exist without it, but can people function anymore without social networking or is it a must? What happened to handwritten letters, using the telephone or even conversing person to person?

As you’ve probably already guessed as ever the cruel mistress that LYYB is we can’t ask all these questions without delivering you some wide spread chaos with a splash of theory. As you know we like to make our Co-Founders lives *cough* miserable... sorry I mean challenging. 

Gemma & Emma... (Our usual victims) are going to give up Facebook for an entire long and gruelling month, and they WILL give it up. They’ll be changing each others’ passwords, deleting the apps off their phones and saying goodbye to all things Facebook. They will be without it from the 1st February to the 1st March. We’ll be adding week by week tormented comments from the two of them and as always at the end be sharing a general consensus.


Will they learn to live without their social media distractions or will they be begging us to be re-activated!


Week One:
Emma: This is not the first time I have not had a Facebook account, once a couple of years ago after an ‘incident’ I decided to delete myself off completely and I have to admit for those 8 months life was so un-complicated, the reason I re-joined was because I had learnt my Facebook lesson, never add people you don’t want looking at your page, try not to look at peoples pages that might upset or anger you and the big one DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY, Facebook is not gospel. After re-instating myself I thought I’d turned a new Facebook leaf so to speak but sadly after a couple of years of having it again I have slipped back into old habits. That is mainly how I see Facebook as habit forming. I have to admit the biggest change this week was deleting the app off my phone, that’s been odd because I usually check my Twitter and Facebook at the same time, to be honest though by the end of this week it’s been refreshing  quite frankly it’s made me remember why I deleted it in the first place, I’m not interested in seeing photos of drunk people acting like tits and I also don’t care about some person I maybe went to school with 10 years ago breaking up some guy they went out with for five minutes, I am also noticing that I have a lot more time, I’m not stuck on Facebook 24/7 anyway but sometimes I can lose hours to it and not even realise, hours I have spent this week doing LYYB work or sorting more important things out. Week one feelings: loving the lack of Facebook. 

Gemma: The first couple of days it was hard to get out of the habit of ‘checking facebook’. I didn't realise how much I depended on checking Facebook every minute of the day. I wake up in the morning, check Facebook, brush my teeth, check Facebook, have breakfast, check Facebook, brush my hair, check Facebook... you get the picture and this goes on throughout the whole day. To tackle this I have started to check LYYB’s Gmail account just to make up for the loss of ‘checking’ Facebook. Isn't it sad how dependant I have become on a social media site!! But in my defence it’s hard to get away from as you can access it 24/7, it’s slapped on commercials and advertisement and everyone talks about it as ‘the norm’. This past week Facebook has been mentioned the majority of conversations like ‘oh I saw this on Facebook’ or ‘oh so and so has added me on Facebook’ or ‘ Have you seen so and so’s pictures on Facebook’ ect ect ect... I think I have noticed this more as I subconsciously know I am not allowed to access mine this month and I feel like I am missing out. This weekend I was at a Hen party which is an example of where I would ‘abuse’ my Facebook with everything to do with the event. During and post the Hen party I was itching to:

• Add new friends I met on the night out so I can keep in contact and say ‘Thanks for the great night see you at the wedding’ and join in the post-hen party banter.
• Post and access the pictures that were taken on the weekend (and delete the horrendous drunken ones)
• Tag myself and others in the places we were visiting.
• Put some random drunken status to make everyone laugh. (maybe this was seen as a blessing in disguise)

I think it’s nice to have the social side of Facebook in this situation. You are sharing, showing, communicating about ‘what you’re doing’ with people. BUT when you really stop and think about it isn't it about getting attention on Facebook? You’re posting a photo or status update to get attention of others and it makes you happy when people have ‘liked’ and commented on your posting. That’s quiet sad really. Maybe this experiment will make me realise other sides of Facebook? hmmm food for thought. 

Week Two:
Emma: Fully into the swing of this no Facebook thing, I admit a couple of times when people have said ‘did you see this on Facebook’ or ‘OMG did you see her comment last night’ I have actually found myself pitying that person for saying that and thinking, seriously... is that all we have to talk about what happens on a social media site? I have to hand it to Mark Zuckerberg he really has us at the bollocks doesn’t he, Facebook is really clever at making you feel like you’re missing out on something. Sadly I’ve been un-well this week but I did have lots of social activities planned, so if I’d been able to attend them I wouldn’t of even thought about it, apart from to write this. I think honestly it’s making me make more effort with the friends that really count, instead of trying to keep in contact half-arsed through Facebook I’m starting to make effort where it counts. 

Gemma: This week I have been having moments where I am saying ‘I wish I had Facebook’. One of these instances was I was asked out to go to the cinema and I didn’t have a clue what good films were out. Usually I would write a status asking my friends what’s a good film to go see... but this month I can’t. Usually my friends are quite good at responding and giving recommendations but this time I have had to choose alone. I had to go on the cinema’s website trawl through the films, read the reviews, watch the trailers... what a load of hassle! However just because Facebook can get you answers straight away does it just make us lazy?! Do we rely too much on what our friends say instead of finding out for ourselves?! hmmmm

Week Three:

Emma: Now I’m fully restored back to full health, I can now say whole-hearted I do miss Facebook, not in the way you might think, I don’t miss writing silly updates, I just miss the comfort of knowing there are people around you brings, also I know for a fact certain people have tried to contact me via it and failed, silly. I would also like to thank the lack of Facebook for encouraging me to sort some things out in my life, one ditch a couple of irritating gentlemen and for allowing me the time to actually strike up conversations with new interesting people via dating websites. That’s right I signed up to some... we’ll see how that pans out. I seem to have much more time for doing ACTUAL fun things.

Gemma:

I met someone this week and the first thing I wanted to do is check them out on Facebook... but I couldn't. This ‘checking’ of people we do on Facebook is a good thing right? Let’s do a little scenario... So you have just met this guy on a night out who you ‘like’ and you check their Facebook. You find that they have all these ‘slutty’ girls posting on their wall, their pictures are of drunken nights out kissing girls and being a general prat. What do you do?? I personally would stay well clear of this guy. Surely this is a positive reason of why we need Facebook to do a little bit of stalking? It gives us the heads up if we need to find out something about them? (while writing this the saying ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’ is popping into my head. hmmm)

But when you really think about it, it’s quite sad that we rely on Facebook to ‘check’ what people are like and snoop at their past. It’s like we have forgotten our face-to-face social skills and it puts up barriers (if you have seen something bad on their profile) as you have automatically judged them. But surely it’s our own fault for how we are seen on Facebook. We have poured your life all over a little online profile where people can judge and comment on. For the majority of people its allowed them to hang out their dirty laundry online for all to see (which in most cases we don’t actually want to see).I don’t miss this aspect of Facebook however I do miss the having a nosey once in a while to see what everyone is up too. hmm let’s see what next week brings.

Week Four:

Emma: I have a mixed bag of feelings this week, I know that regaining Facebook is looming and I feel really divided about it. One side of me really wants to delete it, goodbye Facebook but as much as I hate to admit it I think I do actually need it, especially for family, as we don’t all live together or in the same cities... having said that I’ve gone on record this week as saying I think ‘Facebook is a poor excuse to be a shit friend’ basically what I’m saying is the first way someone contacts you says a lot about a friendship, lets face it it’s not hard to send a text is it or make a phone call, Facebook is at your fingertips, and I think that people ‘think’ using it to talk to people is a good way of communicating but actually it’s really just a way of getting away with not speaking in person or even a more personal form of contact. I think perhaps a Facebook cull is in order... not deletion.

Gemma: This week I am finally NOT...I repeat.. NOT missing Facebook. Crazy right?! I think I have finally got over the ‘need’ for checking Facebook. I have learnt that my whole social life doesn't revolve around it and there is other means of communication with my friends.  Although Facebook is a useful tool to have I really think we depend on it too much. Next week when we get it back I think I wont be on it 24/7 like I was before which makes me happy. This experiment has taught me a lot of things and one of them is wherever you go, whatever you do Facebook will always be there!!! ahhhhh hehe ;-)

It’s been a tough month for Emma & Gemma, we think our little experiment has really made the girls think about than more than just using social media but about their lives and relationships with people.

Who knew going without Facebook for four weeks could do this to two people.

Perhaps people take for granted the power social media has on our everyday lives.

LYYB will be keeping their social media as without it we simply wouldn’t exist...

It’s given LYYB a lot to think about.

LYYB x

Ask a bird- February

Here's our ladies answers to this months question. Enjoy..

'Valentines Day, whether you're coupled up or single how does the allegedly most romantic day of the year make you feel? Do you celebrate or dread it? Do you always receive a dozen red roses or does it pass you by without a care? Your thoughts LYYBers.'

Aimee  

I've never really had a valentine - text last year from Mat as I was in Portugal! And year before from my girl friends at college because our boyfriends were knobs! So it's nice to show the people around you - you love them! But I think it's over rated and expensive! Go out on a normal day and celebrate your love! I feel it's pushed on a specific day! Me and Mat go out once a month to celebrate (bit sad I know) I tell Mat, my mum and dad, friends I love them every day so 14th Feb won't be any different - and I'm engaged haha we shall see.

Kim

I'm quite romantic but I'm aware of the commercial aspect of it and
I've learned that romance is something that should be a random
feeling/act that just happens when it does! I don't count down the days
(my birthday is 4 days after!), but it's nice to mark the occasion in
our own way, as we are married and it's important to continue making an
effort.

We're both far from traditional, so chocs and roses aren't standard
(although I would never complain). We used to buy each other a 'rude'
present on Valentine's Day which meant an annual trip to Ann Summers!
lol We don't fuss over pressies now though, but I've bought my card
already this year.

Twice in the past, we've experienced two VERY LATE take-aways so we've
learned not to bother with take-aways on Valentine's Day any more, and
we think going out for a meal is a bit tacky when everyone else is doing
the same thing. So now we stay at home and surprise each other with a
three-course meal. Last year, I did the starter and dessert and Luke
made the main; this year, I'll do the main and vice versa. It's fun, we
both make an effort and we don't let on what we've done. I'm easily
pleased. ;^) Perhaps romance is basically making an effort and putting
thought into things.

One point I'd like to make though is that I don't think singles should
be maudlin' at home! Single people should be enjoying their own company
and making the most of their time enjoying what they like to do because
you don't know when a partner will come along and introduce that
frustrating word 'COMPROMISE'. Singles shouldn't be left out on
Valentine's Day: use the time to pamper yourself.

Hannah
When I've been in a relationship, it's often been an opportunity
to have fun with it, I prefer a funny card to a soppy one! I'm not one
for grand gestures. As a single girl who sells her cards and
illustrations online, it's currently an opportunity to sell cards to
lovey dovey couples.

Vicky

Hmmm it goes by without me even thinking about it and if i do think about it, it makes me feel poo cos it reminds me of my singleton life! ha.. its just another way of getting money out of people for a stupid reason!

Want to see our chaps answers to this question??? Click here to have a nosey

Ask a Chap - February

At LYYB the ladies of the business are always pontificating the behavioural traits of the gentlemen they encounter. We decided we’d had enough of their constant and frustrated pondering so LYYB is putting these ever so complex questions to four men a month in a bid to put our lady issues to rest.

Valentines Day, whether you're coupled up or single how does the allegedly most romantic day of the year make you feel? Do you celebrate or dread it? Do you always receive a dozen red roses or does it pass you by without a care? Your thoughts LYYBers.



Michael 28  
I have never had a lot of luck when it comes to Valentine's Day being single for a large proportion of them so far, and seeing happy couples almost giggling with excitement make me reflect on my single status. Although I don't believe you need to be a couple to be happy,
what occurred to me is that, on Valentine's day you can pretty much have free reign to be as flamboyant and make wildly outrageous romantic gestures as people seem ever so slightly more open to the idea of falling love. Which in turn fills me with hope and giddiness at the idea
of happiness.
I always celebrate Valentine's day no matter what, If I am on my own I will treat myself with something special, a little trinket or taking a friend out for a meal (not on Valentine's day that would be strange). I feel it's a day to celebrate love not that your in a relationship, so you can do what the hell you like.
OK love you, bye.



Xanti Tito Xipu, 21
Valentines Day .... There’s no word of a lie it’s a one of them days that makes a person feel a bit warm... but when you are single it is a tad different... I mean you want to be doing all the things that loved up folk do but you cant because you haven’t got anyone special to share that love and romance with. I definitely don’t dread the day, just cause you haven't got a valentine doesn’t mean that you should give up on the chance of finding one, that’s how I see it.




Will Silverside

"This is Will... he's single." What a common and apparently vitally important part of my identity this has become in recent months. I'm just glad that this has replaced, "Hi meet Will... He's gay."

Whilst I've had relationships, I've never actually shared a valentines day with anyone. In some respects, I do dread it. Yes, I am single but am I lonely? My answer, (363 days a year at least) would be no. But every year to some degree I find myself wallowing in self pity over how empty and without meaning my life is. If this was truly how I felt about my life, then I would feel it every day- not just once a year on February 14th.

On the flip side of the coin though, (And sorry to resort to predictable view point) Isn't it just commercialised crap? There's no romance in Valentines Day- It has become about buying cards, flowers and chocolate. There is more to love than that.

I have a good life. I am extremely lucky for what I have. Sure, a boyfriend might give my life something it doesn't know it's missing but until that day, February 14th will continue to disappoint.
Will (I am Soooo Carrie Bradshaw) Silverside

Matt, 27

I'm not a massive fan of Valentine's Day. If you're single it can feel like people are rubbing your face in it, and if you're attached then, depending on how your relationship works, the pressure's on to "be romantic". If you want to go and do something then everywhere's busy and things are more expensive, and it's hard not to come to the conclusion that Valentine's Day as we know it is really just a money-making excercise.

I have had enjoyable Valentine's Days when in a relationship, but that had nothing to do with the day itself. Exchanging cards and so on is fine, but if you really care about someone you should be showing them this all the time, not just on an appointed day of the year. Flowers and chocolates on Valentine's Day? Pretty much what's expected of you. Flowers and chocolates any other day of the year, because you just felt like treating your other half? To me, seems more meaningful.

As a guy, I also feel, rightly or wrongly, that the onus falls on me to "be romantic" and do or organise something, and to me it doesn't feel very romantic or spontaneous if I'm doing it because it's Valentine's Day.



Check out what our birds have to say about this.... Click here

Silent Sunday #8

8#

Silent Sunday #7

#7

Deck the halls with STI's

Christmas party season is nearly here. The LBD’s are being pressed and the killer heels are being dusted off and we think we speak for everyone when we say we’re all looking forward to the festive season’s shenanigans.

At LYYB we can’t help but think it’s perfect timing for another less festive tradition. We have our cars MOT’d once a year, we celebrate Christmas once a year, hell we even celebrate Halloween once a year, so why don’t we celebrate our health?

We’re not talking colds and coughs, we’re talking sexual. Christmas party season is the perfect time for an STI screening. A few weeks before your party book yourself in at your local GUM clinic [click here for more info] and make sure you have a clean bill of health before all the festivities begin.

With the national statistics for STI’s on the increase [click here for more info] it is becoming an epidemic for local NHS services to keep control of and fight. As sensible mature adults it is our responsibility not just to ourselves but to others to make sure we’re not carrying anything.

To prove here at LYYB we are not just all mince pie and no filling we went and got ourselves tested for the Christmas season.

Gemma’s Quote: ‘Not going to lie, I was completely bricking it!!!!! The thought of a nurse going down there and investigating it with instruments completely made me cringe, but it’s something that needs to be done! There are loads of things in life we don't particularly want to do, but something like this is only TINY compared to the things you would have to put up with if you did contract an STI or worse. After some awkward giggles and closing of eyes the whole ‘procedure’ was quick, pain free and completely professional. The worst bit I found was waiting for the results. They said you should hear (via text) between 1-2 weeks and if you are like me loads of crazy ideas/worries came into my head. However once you get the all clear it’s a great peace of mind! My advice is don't put off having one done, just grow some and do it!’

Emma’s Quote: ‘This is not my first time having an STI test, the experience is never what you would call a joy, I find that you’re always asked lots of questions that you can never really be sure of the relevance, for example whether a partner was casual or regular, after all once is enough to contract something. The clinical procedure for a woman is very simple, quick and pain free (more irritating). I can never understand why people don’t go, sure it’s a little embarrassing but it’s important, I don’t like having my lady garden on show to world as much as the next person but the nurses and doctors who carry out the procedure are professionals, they’ve seen it all before and if you have something else wrong with you you’d want an expert looking at it so why not for STIs?’

Top tips for surviving an STI check up:

1) Take a friend with you!

2) Have all your sexual history in your head before you go in so you can give them accurate answers e.g; whether your partners were casual or regular and be honest about protection. 

3) If it makes you feel better do ‘tidy’ down there.

4) Wear something that can help cover your dignity! if your a girl we definitely suggest a dress or a long top

5) Use the cloth or towel provided to cover your bits.

6) The pill counts as medication so when asked if you take any medication tell them which variety you take.

7) Take the free condoms offered or if they’re not offered ask if you can have some.

8) Organise something fun for after your experience. Even if it’s just a drink.

Here are our top useful STI related websites:

http://freetest.me.uk/ you may be eligible for a free Chlamydia test.

http://www.channel4embarrassingillnesses.com/

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Sexually-transmitted-infections/Pages/Introduction.aspx

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-joy-of-teen-sex Although your LYYBers aren’t teens the info from this program is incredible. 

Google ‘C Card’ and your town or city and see if you are eligible for a free card which allows you to pick up free condoms from various locations within your homestead.

So have a very merry Christmas but don’t be a ho, ho, ho … unless you’re clear and protected.

A real Billy Elliot

My name is Freddie Huddleston. I’m a straight twenty one year old guy and I'm a singer/actor/dancer. I’ve been training for a total of five years, two years at Peterborough Regional College and three at Tiffany Theatre College. I graduated in July 2011. I'm writing this to give an insight into to a performers life from my point of view.

When I first started dancing I had no respect or professionalism. I would sit at the back with my mate and chat rather than doing the class properly, the fact that I was a male dancer I used to think I was unique. Another thing thinking back was how alpha male I used to try to be. Being one of the only guys in the class made me feel that I had to somehow compensate for all the girls in the room.

Ballet changed everything for me, it’s the single reason that I have such a respect for the industry. I used to feel like “ballet was for girls” or “only gay’s do ballet” when really once your surrounded by a room full of “only ballet people” there isn’t anyone making those remarks and no one notices you’re wearing tights. There’s just a room full of like minded people who want to improve. For me it wasn’t just a new dance style, it was a discipline. I could go into a class shut myself off from the outside world and focus single mindedly on controlling my body which is ridiculously hard to master. After every class you would take a Reverance (a bow) and clap the teacher thanking her for her class. This appreciation and respect transferred into every other dance style and actually made me a better all round dancer as well as a more respectful and mindful person.

From this point onward everything in my life changed, I no longer cared what anyone thought about me or what I did anymore because I realised I didn’t need to care what they thought. I was completely comfortable with who I was and proud of what I was doing. I would do what I wanted do to. I laugh now when I see those alpha male guys who are so closed minded to everything and so insecure in themselves that they have to wall off anything outside of their comfort zone.

One thing Ive realised about auditioning is that being talented isn't enough. From people that graduated last year to people that have been out for 10 years and then to me, and we are all in competition for the same jobs. I was recently at a closed audition for a West End musical and out of a room full of 100 boys they needed 2. It didn’t matter to the casting panel if you were any good, they needed two people who looked right and fitted the costumes of the people that had just left. This is what it all boils down to. I can’t stress enough that a lot of the jobs especially in the commercial industry are based solely on “look” not talent at all. You can walk into a room, dance rings around other people and get knocked back purely on the height or the colour of your hair. The phrase “Its not what you know its who you know” couldn’t be truer. All the work Ive done since I left college has been through people that know me, they know how hard I work, how reliable and easy I am to work with. Being reliable and friendly to work with is just as important as being talented.

The plus side is I have fun every day, I’ve had the chance to see the world for free even though I’ve been knocked back. Would I recommend a new person starting out to go down this route? Absolutely. It may seem on paper that its unfair and hard, but when you really love what your doing, the positives are so great that the other stuff just seems to fade away and not be a problem. So one bit of advice if you’re thinking of doing it is make sure you really, really love it. Whoever you are you have to go to “work” to earn and I don’t think that anyone has it easy … but how many people can truthfully say that they love their job? I can, and for now that’s all that matters.

Written by Freddie Huddleston.
Edited by Emma Davies

For any comments, compliments or contact please e-mail lyyb.lyyb@gmail.com

Anything you can do, we can do better 'The COD Challenge'

This is our first 'anything you can do, we can do better' challenge, the idea is that a man, bloke, gentleman or male (whatever you wish to call them) challenges your LYYB co-creators to a 'manly' task, something which ordinarily a guy reckons us ladies are un-capable of completing.

This is a simple idea yes? Said man throws a mission our way with set rules and an invigilator to make sure we pass the test in the correct way and we then write you an amusing account.

In the end we tell you what our consensus is ... did we do it better than a man.

Our first 'anything you can do, we can do better' challenge was set by none other than a Mr Stuart King ... if the surname doesn’t twig that's our very own Gemma's brother.  He tasked us with the some strict instructions to play the game Call Of Duty aka COD http://www.callofduty.com/





Our invigilator for this task was a good friend and COD expert Iain Bradley.

Here are Stuart's strict instructions:

1. Turn on PS3
2. Set up a new user profile from main menu
3. Load up MW3
4. Set up another controller as controller 2
5. Ensure PS3 is connected to the Internet
6. Start up Multiplayer mode and set up an online profile
7. During the Multiplayer (online) game complete the following tasks:
a. Blow up a vehicle
b. Kill an enemy
c. Get at least one assist
d. Change weapons
e. Crouch and jump
8. Turn off game and PS3

So how did we do???

We can report that both of the LYYB ladies completed the instructions in full (even if it did take a couple of hours)

Emma's Quote: 'After playing COD for over two hours I finally managed to kill someone during an online match, it was thrilling I felt like I was ready to take on the world (of COD). I honestly do see the appeal of this game, the game is 100% geared towards men, which doesn’t annoy me in the slightest. I think that if you have the time to spend on the game, practising online or playing the special Ops I can see how people get really good at it, I think anyone male or female could be awesome at this game, you just need to have a lot of spare time!! I also think that old fable about men not being able to multi task is disproven during this game ... you have to be looking at the map, pressing the correct keys and the whole time making sure some random doesn’t stab you out of no where, I struggled with the hand eye co-ordination involved.'

Gemma's Quote: ‘ I went into the challenge with a negative mind set due to being made to watch it for hours during my uni years. However I ‘maned’ up for this challenge and wanted to prove we can do it to! At first, I was a bit apprehensive when playing and shouted ‘this is barbaric’ a lot when people killed me, but as the hours went on I became more relaxed and got into it. It did take a while to get the hang of shooting, I was frantically pressing the x button to shoot but this is the command to jump ... oops! It was scary how proud I was when I did eventually kill someone! One of the major things I didn't like was just when you thought you were safe, an 80 pointer comes up behind you and stabs/shoots you ... NOT COOL!  In all honesty I can see how people waste a whole day on this game, 2 hours went by so quickly! I shan't be taking up COD as a regular thing, but I am very glad we proved that girls can play this ‘male’ focused game.’

After careful deliberation the general consensus is us LYYB girlie birds can play COD just as good as any bloke, if we had the time to practise and played more often anyone could get those 80 points.

We would urge other girls to give it a go ... it might not seem like your cup of tea and you might be sick to the back teeth of your boyfriend playing it but you might just have found a new hobby.

Iain Bradley was asked to make a comment on our performance: 'Average at best' ... thanks Iain.

CODette's over and out. LYYB.


To send us an 'anything you can do, we can do better' challenge please drop us an e-mail at lyyb.lyyb@gmail.com or via our Facebook/Twitter.