Monday, 12 March 2012

An end to Facebook

LYYB loves Facebook as much as the next human but we’re concerned about a few woeful stories we’ve heard in regards to this social media phenomenon. Is it possible for Facebook to ruin relationships, cause arguments and perhaps even destroy everything an individual holds dear? 

Surely not? Social media is key in today’s society even LYYB wouldn’t exist without it, but can people function anymore without social networking or is it a must? What happened to handwritten letters, using the telephone or even conversing person to person?

As you’ve probably already guessed as ever the cruel mistress that LYYB is we can’t ask all these questions without delivering you some wide spread chaos with a splash of theory. As you know we like to make our Co-Founders lives *cough* miserable... sorry I mean challenging. 

Gemma & Emma... (Our usual victims) are going to give up Facebook for an entire long and gruelling month, and they WILL give it up. They’ll be changing each others’ passwords, deleting the apps off their phones and saying goodbye to all things Facebook. They will be without it from the 1st February to the 1st March. We’ll be adding week by week tormented comments from the two of them and as always at the end be sharing a general consensus.

Will they learn to live without their social media distractions or will they be begging us to be re-activated!

Week One:
Emma: This is not the first time I have not had a Facebook account, once a couple of years ago after an ‘incident’ I decided to delete myself off completely and I have to admit for those 8 months life was so un-complicated, the reason I re-joined was because I had learnt my Facebook lesson, never add people you don’t want looking at your page, try not to look at peoples pages that might upset or anger you and the big one DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY, Facebook is not gospel. After re-instating myself I thought I’d turned a new Facebook leaf so to speak but sadly after a couple of years of having it again I have slipped back into old habits. That is mainly how I see Facebook as habit forming. I have to admit the biggest change this week was deleting the app off my phone, that’s been odd because I usually check my Twitter and Facebook at the same time, to be honest though by the end of this week it’s been refreshing  quite frankly it’s made me remember why I deleted it in the first place, I’m not interested in seeing photos of drunk people acting like tits and I also don’t care about some person I maybe went to school with 10 years ago breaking up some guy they went out with for five minutes, I am also noticing that I have a lot more time, I’m not stuck on Facebook 24/7 anyway but sometimes I can lose hours to it and not even realise, hours I have spent this week doing LYYB work or sorting more important things out. Week one feelings: loving the lack of Facebook. 

The first couple of days it was hard to get out of the habit of ‘checking facebook’. I didn't realise how much I depended on checking Facebook every minute of the day. I wake up in the morning, check Facebook, brush my teeth, check Facebook, have breakfast, check Facebook, brush my hair, check Facebook... you get the picture and this goes on throughout the whole day. To tackle this I have started to check LYYB’s Gmail account just to make up for the loss of ‘checking’ Facebook. Isn't it sad how dependant I have become on a social media site!! But in my defence it’s hard to get away from as you can access it 24/7, it’s slapped on commercials and advertisement and everyone talks about it as ‘the norm’. This past week Facebook has been mentioned the majority of conversations like ‘oh I saw this on Facebook’ or ‘oh so and so has added me on Facebook’ or ‘ Have you seen so and so’s pictures on Facebook’ ect ect ect... I think I have noticed this more as I subconsciously know I am not allowed to access mine this month and I feel like I am missing out. This weekend I was at a Hen party which is an example of where I would ‘abuse’ my Facebook with everything to do with the event. During and post the Hen party I was itching to:

  • Add new friends I met on the night out so I can keep in contact and say ‘Thanks for the great night see you at the wedding’ and join in the post-hen party banter.
  • Post and access the pictures that were taken on the weekend (and delete the horrendous drunken ones)
  • Tag myself and others in the places we were visiting.
  • Put some random drunken status to make everyone laugh. (maybe this was seen as a blessing in disguise)
I think it’s nice to have the social side of Facebook in this situation. You are sharing, showing, communicating about ‘what you’re doing’ with people. BUT when you really stop and think about it isn't it about getting attention on Facebook? You’re posting a photo or status update to get attention of others and it makes you happy when people have ‘liked’ and commented on your posting. That’s quiet sad really. Maybe this experiment will make me realise other sides of Facebook? hmmm food for thought. 

Week Two:
Emma: Fully into the swing of this no Facebook thing, I admit a couple of times when people have said ‘did you see this on Facebook’ or ‘OMG did you see her comment last night’ I have actually found myself pitying that person for saying that and thinking, seriously... is that all we have to talk about what happens on a social media site? I have to hand it to Mark Zuckerberg he really has us at the bollocks doesn’t he, Facebook is really clever at making you feel like you’re missing out on something. Sadly I’ve been un-well this week but I did have lots of social activities planned, so if I’d been able to attend them I wouldn’t of even thought about it, apart from to write this. I think honestly it’s making me make more effort with the friends that really count, instead of trying to keep in contact half-arsed through Facebook I’m starting to make effort where it counts. 

Gemma: This week I have been having moments where I am saying ‘I wish I had Facebook’. One of these instances was I was asked out to go to the cinema and I didn’t have a clue what good films were out. Usually I would write a status asking my friends what’s a good film to go see... but this month I can’t. Usually my friends are quite good at responding and giving recommendations but this time I have had to choose alone. I had to go on the cinema’s website trawl through the films, read the reviews, watch the trailers... what a load of hassle! However just because Facebook can get you answers straight away does it just make us lazy?! Do we rely too much on what our friends say instead of finding out for ourselves?! hmmmm

Week Three:
Emma: Now I’m fully restored back to full health, I can now say whole-hearted I do miss Facebook, not in the way you might think, I don’t miss writing silly updates, I just miss the comfort of knowing there are people around you brings, also I know for a fact certain people have tried to contact me via it and failed, silly. I would also like to thank the lack of Facebook for encouraging me to sort some things out in my life, one ditch a couple of irritating gentlemen and for allowing me the time to actually strike up conversations with new interesting people via dating websites. That’s right I signed up to some... we’ll see how that pans out. I seem to have much more time for doing ACTUAL fun things.

I met someone this week and the first thing I wanted to do is check them out on Facebook... but I couldn't. This ‘checking’ of people we do on Facebook is a good thing right? Let’s do a little scenario... So you have just met this guy on a night out who you ‘like’ and you check their Facebook. You find that they have all these ‘slutty’ girls posting on their wall, their pictures are of drunken nights out kissing girls and being a general prat. What do you do?? I personally would stay well clear of this guy. Surely this is a positive reason of why we need Facebook to do a little bit of stalking? It gives us the heads up if we need to find out something about them? (while writing this the saying ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’ is popping into my head. hmmm)

But when you really think about it, it’s quite sad that we rely on Facebook to ‘check’ what people are like and snoop at their past. It’s like we have forgotten our face-to-face social skills and it puts up barriers (if you have seen something bad on their profile) as you have automatically judged them. But surely it’s our own fault for how we are seen on Facebook. We have poured your life all over a little online profile where people can judge and comment on. For the majority of people its allowed them to hang out their dirty laundry online for all to see (which in most cases we don’t actually want to see).I don’t miss this aspect of Facebook however I do miss the having a nosey once in a while to see what everyone is up too. hmm let’s see what next week brings.

Week Four:
Emma: I have a mixed bag of feelings this week, I know that regaining Facebook is looming and I feel really divided about it. One side of me really wants to delete it, goodbye Facebook but as much as I hate to admit it I think I do actually need it, especially for family, as we don’t all live together or in the same cities... having said that I’ve gone on record this week as saying I think ‘Facebook is a poor excuse to be a shit friend’ basically what I’m saying is the first way someone contacts you says a lot about a friendship, lets face it it’s not hard to send a text is it or make a phone call, Facebook is at your fingertips, and I think that people ‘think’ using it to talk to people is a good way of communicating but actually it’s really just a way of getting away with not speaking in person or even a more personal form of contact. I think perhaps a Facebook cull is in order... not deletion.

Gemma: This week I am finally NOT...I repeat.. NOT missing Facebook. Crazy right?! I think I have finally got over the ‘need’ for checking Facebook. I have learnt that my whole social life doesn't revolve around it and there is other means of communication with my friends.  Although Facebook is a useful tool to have I really think we depend on it too much. Next week when we get it back I think I wont be on it 24/7 like I was before which makes me happy. This experiment has taught me a lot of things and one of them is wherever you go, whatever you do Facebook will always be there!!! ahhhhh hehe ;-)

It’s been a tough month for Emma & Gemma, we think our little experiment has really made the girls think about than more than just using social media but about their lives and relationships with people.

Who knew going without Facebook for four weeks could do this to two people.
Perhaps people take for granted the power social media has on our everyday lives.
LYYB will be keeping their social media as without it we simply wouldn’t exist...
It’s given LYYB a lot to think about.


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