Sunday, 1 January 2012

Ask a Chap- January

At LYYB the ladies of the business are always pontificating the behavioural traits of the gentlemen they encounter. We decided we’d had enough of their constant and frustrated pondering so LYYB is putting these ever so complex questions to four men a month in a bid to put our lady issues to rest.

'Being single is a constant battle for all parties involved, first dates are especially mind boggling, what are your do’s and don’ts for that ever so awkward occasion? How do you think us ladies should appear? Dressed up? Should we kiss you? Is it wrong to sleep with someone on the first date? Basically gents round up your first date etiquette for us'

Chris, 24
First dates: its definitely wrong to sleep or try to sleep with someone on the first date it comes across creepy and could ruin any chance of things working out! I think walk them home or pay for the taxi and a kiss before you leave each other is the best way to end it, if you still like each other after the first date then a kiss will keep each party wanting more (providing you don't get slobbered on)  Rule 1 is the bloke should always pay for the whole first date, don't be afraid to open up and be honest about things it keeps conversation going and let's her know more about you, obviously you don't want to go to far but If she still doesn't think your insane afterwards then a second date hopefully will be on the cards. Ask plenty of questions, this should come naturally as nervous as you might be after all you should be interested in her if your on a date together. Don't try to be funny it just makes you look stupid normally the harder you try the less funny you are, you’re either funny or you’re not never try to be something you’re not! Big rule is never lie about stuff if you end up together then they will find out the truth! remember you are both gonna be nervous so stay calm don't over think things and just be yourself (as cheesy as that sounds)

Dustin Hutton, 29, New York
For Guys--
Do: open doors, pull out chairs, be polite, not just to your date but to everyone you come into contact with whilst in your date's company, ask open ended questions and actually listen to the answer (it makes a difference)
For Ladies--
Do: Dress in whatever fashion makes you feel the most comfortable but wear nice perfume (dudes are suckers for nice smells), kiss but don't sleep with on first date (any girl I've ever slept with on a first date has never lasted long), when the bill comes let us pay but at the very least put up a little fight (it makes us feel like men)

Adam, 25
Please let us know beforehand of any dietary needs you have. There is nothing worse than booking the best table at a nice restaurant only to discover you hate everything on the menu. Make an effort with clothes and appearance, but don’t fret about it too much.
A kiss on the cheek is the acceptable greeting for both parties.
Feel free to talk about anything that interests you. If you find we’re being a little quiet, don’t back off; engage with us. Besides that, we like to listen. However….
If you want dessert, have dessert.
Sex on a first date should be regarded as a possibility. Make it clear to us if that that is the direction you want the evening to be heading. Carry condoms. We will think you are responsible, not a slut. Sorry to say, but we may forget them ourselves.
Whatever happens, enjoy yourself. It is meant to be fun after all.

Paul, 26
For me first dates are all about looking for that spark and discovering whether the girl is on the same wavelength as me, and as such etiquette comes second to this. First impressions and looks aren't everything but of course I'm not naive enough to think that they don't hold weight. For example if I arrange to meet a girl in my local pub and she rocks up looking like something from TOWIE then I'm going to be understandably apprehensive. Similarly if we're meeting in a cocktail bar and she turns up in jeans and a hoodie I'm not going to be impressed, so with regards to dress-code common sense should prevail on both sides. I'll freely admit I'm old fashioned when it comes to these things, sex on a first date isn't a no-no but there has to be some serious chemistry for me to consider it. Too many people rush into it, for me the anticipation makes it all the sweeter when you do eventually get to the bedroom. As for kissing I think again that largely depends on the chemistry. If I think the date's gone well and I'm getting the right signals then of course I'll make a move and would welcome it if she did the same, otherwise if she gives me a peck on the cheek at the end of the night then I'm not going to be disappointed, it is only the first date after all.

Check out what our ladies say about this...'Ask a Bird'

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